Let’s face it: raising kids is hard. Really hard. And somewhere along the line, it stopped being about just keeping them alive and became about raising little geniuses who can do algebra by age 5, speak Mandarin fluently, play Bach on the violin, and masterfully juggle three sports schedules. Meanwhile, you're still trying to figure out how to get them to brush their teeth without making it feel like you’re reenacting an exorcism every morning.
I don’t know about you, but some days it feels like we’re all secretly in a competition we didn’t sign up for. You hear it all the time: “My toddler speaks Spanish fluently.” “Oh, little Emily started violin lessons at three!” “Jake just made the regional soccer team. Again.” Meanwhile, you’re celebrating the fact that your kid made it to school without socks that don’t match, and they didn’t scream bloody murder about brushing their hair. Major victory, right?
We’re constantly bombarded by messages that, in order to be a good parent, we need to have our kids excelling in multiple fields simultaneously. They should speak at least two languages fluently by age 7, because obviously, that’s when their future success depends on it. They should be learning an instrument by the time they can walk, because, who knows, maybe they’re a musical genius waiting to happen! And don’t forget sports, because if they’re not playing three different ones, how will they ever get a college scholarship?!
Honestly, it’s enough to make you wonder if you missed the parenting manual that explains how you’re supposed to make all this happen. Especially when you’re still trying to win the battle of getting them to brush their teeth twice a day. Who knew oral hygiene could be so controversial?
Let me just say it: there’s a special kind of exhaustion that comes from arguing with a 7-year-old about eating their dinner or brushing teeth. “But I brushed yesterday!” they say, with an air of disbelief that you’d have the audacity to suggest they repeat this terrible task. Meanwhile, you’re standing there, toothbrush in hand, wondering if this is really the hill you’re going to die on today.
As parents, we’re often our own worst enemies. We feel the pressure from social media, from that overachieving neighbor, and even from our own kids, to be the perfect parent. It’s like there’s a constant background track of, “Are you doing enough?” playing in your mind.
But it’s not just about what we’re doing—it’s about what everyone else’s kids seem to be doing. You know the drill: you’re scrolling through Instagram, and there it is—a photo of someone’s 5-year-old performing a solo at their piano recital, looking like a tiny Mozart, while your child is still figuring out how to clap on beat during the birthday song.
It’s easy to feel like you’re failing. If everyone else’s kid is a prodigy, then what does it say about us? About our parenting? About the fact that we’re still trying to figure out how to remember which day is “show and tell” and which is “wear your pajamas to school” day (wink, wink - that’s also where TULA can jump in!)
But let’s be real for a second: we’re all just doing our best. And here’s the truth: a lot of those picture-perfect parenting moments are just that—moments. We don’t see the tantrums, the bribes, the late-night Googling of “how to get your kid to love piano.” We’re all just figuring it out as we go along, one toothpaste fight at a time.
In the middle of all this pressure to have the most impressive child on the block, we forget to celebrate the real wins. Like the time your kid actually asked to go to bed (okay, it was one time, but still). Or when they told a funny joke that didn’t involve fart noises. Or when they quietly entertained themselves for a solid 15 minutes while you drank a cup of coffee in peace.
These are the small, quiet victories that don’t make it to Instagram but mean just as much as that piano recital video. Maybe even more, because they’re real, and they’re yours.
So, if your kid isn’t playing the violin while reciting French poetry on the way to their weekly soccer game—take a deep breath. You’re doing great. If they speak one language, congratulations. If they don’t, guess what? That’s fine too. If you’re not ready to take on the world of sports scheduling, that’s okay—you’ll get there. Or maybe you won’t. Maybe your kid will end up hating sports but will be a Lego master. And that’s cool too.
At the end of the day, none of us really know what we’re doing. We’re all winging it, day by day, snack by snack. Sometimes we get it right. Sometimes we screw it up. Sometimes, no matter what we do, our kids are just going to leave the house wearing two different shoes.
So, let’s ease up on ourselves. The pressure of parenthood is real, but it doesn’t have to consume us. As long as your kid knows they’re loved (even when you’re forcing them to brush their hair or get their shoes on), that’s what really matters.
Now, if you’ll excuse me, I have a child to chase down with a toothbrush.